I wish I could call my mom, Diana, and tell her Happy Mothers Day, and Brenda as well. Diana gave me life, taught me that sacrifices are necessary to keep your children. She showed me that discipline is necessary to keep them safe. She then taught me that learning to lean on myself more than others will always be the smart thing. She was not affectionate, rarely said *I love you* and I thought growing up that means she didn't love me. When she was sick and I went to be with her, I realized that was a lie. I realized that we had more in common than I thought. The time spent with her watching Ancient Aliens was the best. Taking her around town to get her out was amazing. I learned more, she spoke more and told me she loved me. In the end, when her last few words were to my daughter and I to let us show she loved us meant more than I can even say.
Brenda became *mom* in August 2005 ... she treated all of us like family and she was mom for all intents and purposes. She was the person I confided in, and shared many interests.
I love them both dearly and today my heart breaks twice.
In August 2014 I lost my mother to lung cancer and then in November of that year I lost Brenda. I cannot begin to describe the pain, emptiness, loss and devastation that losing them both has done to me.
I think of them both everyday and fight the urge to call them.
I have old emails from Brenda and a voice mail saved from mom. It helps, but it doesn't lessen the hole in my heart.
Today on Mother's Day I'm telling these two women, You are the reason I'm the mom I am now. I make sure everyday my daughter knows she is loved, appreciated, beautiful and the most important person in my life. She is my #1 always.
For my friends who are mother's, know that your job as a mom is the most important. You are helping to raise our future. Do it with love, not hate. Teach them that love will always be stronger than hate.
To the dads who've stepped up and had to assume both roles, you are amazing men and I know from experience being mother and father is tough. Remember to keep the softer side like a mom, because kids need that in their lives.
I'm grateful every time I'm called mom, and everyday I have my daughter, is one more day to show her I love her.
